A Mindful Look at Making a Resolution

new years blogIt seems as if this time of year the hot topic for bloggers is New Year’s resolutions. There is the group that write about the many resolutions they will make. They start the year with a renewed sense of optimism and hope that what they learned in the previous year will serve as the foundation for further growth and development. Then there is the group that write about the resolutions they should make but refuse to do so as it sets them up for imminent failure a month down the road when the resolution is a distant memory.

Each year, I fall into one of those two categories. There are years I whip out a new journal and record the list of resolutions I know I should make: exercise more, get more sleep, cut out bad carbs and sugar and so on. Other years, I wake up on New Years Day, give thanks for a new year, and motor on with life as I am currently living it. This year, I know I should exercise more, get more sleep, and cut out the bad carbs and sugar but, since I tell myself this on most days, it seems futile to put them down on a list. Instead I want one resolution, something that can serve as a beacon for the journey through 2013.

When coming up with a New Year’s resolution, I think we need to take time to be mindful of the experiences that come into our lives and the lessons we learned the previous year. Lately, it seems as if most things I read, stumble upon, or am sent by others revolve around the importance of making mistakes. About a year ago, I watched Brene Brown’s famous TedTalk on her book, The Gifts of Imperfection. I ordered the book shortly after but only just started reading it after the book repeatedly came up in conversations, in book recommendations from friends, and even while flipping through magazines. This is just one example of the many reminders I have had to learn to be more comfortable with making mistakes. Perhaps the universe is trying to tell me something, or perhaps my discomfort with even the thought of making mistakes has made me more sensitive to the message. Either way, I have been listening.

When I was searching for a quote regarding New Year’s resolutions, I stumbled upon the wise words of Neil Gaiman. This is what he had to say:

“I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes. Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and more importantly, you’re Doing Something. So that’s my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make New Mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody’s ever made before. Don’t freeze, don’t stop, don’t worry that it isn’t good enough, or it isn’t perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work or family or life. Whatever it is you’re scared of doing, Do it. Make your mistakes, next year and forever.”

So this is my one and only resolution, to become more comfortable with making the mistakes that come with taking risks and to be more forgiving of myself when I do. Each day I remind middle school students, when I am teaching them in the classroom or they are sitting in my office because they have made some sort of a mistake themselves, that life is all about making mistakes, being accountable, and learning from them. I then sometimes get to remind their parents that the purpose of childhood is to make lots of small mistakes and to learn from them so they are hopefully better equipped to handle the big ones that come with being an adult or an emerging adult. I also remind kids that mistakes are a part of life and they are a risk we take if we truly want to push ourselves out of our own comfort zones, embrace challenges, and strive to be more creative and authentic people. Somewhere along the way, some of us, including myself, forgot that the same message we give kids is equally as important in adulthood.

So my wish for you this year is that you take a chance on yourself and try something new. Maybe it’s a new idea you have wanted to try out at work, maybe it’s a new hobby, or maybe it’s a trip you have wanted to take. As Robert Schuller said, “What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?” As Nike said, “Just do it.”